Have A Laugh Today

I am sharing some jokes:

#1: What word is always pronounced wrong?

#2: What do you lose whenever you stand up?

#3: What is very light, but cannot be held for long?

#4: What is the richest kind of air?

#5: Which runs faster, hot or cold?

#6: Why is the calendar so sad?

Hints:

#1: Wrong

#2: Your lap

#3:____your turn

#4: ____your turn

#5:_____your turn

#6: Because its days are numbered.

Weekend Funnies

#1: What bird can lift the most?  (A crane)

#2: What can you hold without ever touching it? (A conversation)

#3: What clothes does a house wear? (Address)

#4: What do the moon and the false teeth have in common?

(They both come out at night time)

#5: What are the strongest days of the week?

(Saturday and Sunday, the rest are all week (weak) days.)

#6: Which runs faster, hot or cold?

(hot, because everyone can catch a cold)

#7: What is the most dangerous city? (Electricity)

Rib Ticklers-Laugh With Jingle

It is Saturday, time 4 some laughters.

#1: What has one horn and gives milk?

Answer: a milk truck.

#2: What’s gray, eat fish, and lives in Washington D. C.?

Answer: The Presidential Seal.

#3: What did the rug say to the floor?

Answer: Don’t move, I’ve got you covered.

#4: What did the necktie say to the hat?

Answer: You go ahead, I’ll hang around for a while.

#5: If a long dress is an evening wear, What is a suit of armor?

Answer: Silverwear.

#6: What bird can lift the most?

Answer: A crane.

#7: what can you hold without ever touching it?

Answer: a conversation.

#8: What clothes does a house wear?

Answer: Address.

Thank You!

Happy End of July!

Monkey Business

#1:

What is the first thing an ape learns in school?

#2:

When do monkeys fall from the sky?

#3:

What do you call an exploding monkey?

#4:

What is chimp’s favorite cookies?

#5:

How do you catch a monkey?

Solutions:

#1: Ape, B, C’s

#2:Ape-ril Fool’s Day  (In America, on April fool’s day, people tell silly whoppers or lies to have fun)

#3:A baboom

#4:chocolate chimp cookies

#5:hang from the tree and make yourself look like a banana.

*****

Hello, How are You?

 

Thank You for trying!

Happy Happy Saturday!

YOU Rock!

😉 😉 😉

Laugh All The Way!

Everyone  wants some laughter, I have read and picked the following Jokes from a book called “A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Boardroom“, using humor in Business Speaking, written by Michael Iapoce.

Christmas:

–> We considered giving each of the employees a unique kind of gift this year-batteries, toys not included.

–> My child did a Christmas drawing showing two camels approaching the inn and one going in the opposite direction. it said: “He is looking for a place to park.”

U. S. Cities/States:

–> [Beverly Hills] This is a pretty rich community. The unemployment office has valet parking.

–> [California] The heavy rains in winter cause a lot of problems, I got a ticket for going through a red light…and I was in a house at the time.

–> [New York City] When I got to New York I was told I could get an excellent room for just &30 a night. But the room was in New Jersey.

–> [Washington,D. C.] It’s a funny city. One week you’re on the cover of Time, the next week you’re doing it.

Politics:

–> He’s a shrewd politician. He always sits to the left of Republicans, to the right of Democrats, and in front of any cameras.

–> If you want to learn about your family history, run for office…and the press will tell you everything.

Adverstising

–> Stopping advertising to save money is like stopping your watch to save time.

–> Doing business without advertising is like winking at a stranger in the dark. You know what you’re doing. But nobody else does.

–> Advertising without research is like shooting an arrow into the air and then looking for a target to catch it with.

I hope that you laugh all the way to Christmas! Take it Easy! 🙂

I find this link very hilarious, watch the video for 7 minutes, see how American woman learn to sound like a British woman by say certain words differently.

http://kimberlysays.wordpress.com/2009/12/22/how-to-speak-with-a-british-accent/